October 21, 2014

How I Exercise

Since I talked about working out really hard in my last post, I thought I'd write a little something about how I actually exercise. Anyone can do it! I promise.

Some days, I will feel the sudden, overwhelming urge to run and usually will oblige myself because it happens so very (very) rarely and I need to take advantage of the surprising need to be unlazy.

When one of those days happens, this is oftentimes, what goes down:

Stumble out of bed.



Feel full of energy.

Hatch a harebrained idea:


Head to the bathroom to wash up.

Look in the mirror.


Wonder how an extinct animal came to nest on my head.

Try to fix it.


It takes awhile. I need a haircut.

Wash up and change into sweats.

Eat breakfast.
Which goes like this:

1. Hmmm, what shall I have?
2. Bacon and eggs!
3. Ohh, I made cupcakes last night.
4. This leftover pizza will go bad if I don't eat it right now. Like, RIGHT NOW.


And before I know it, I've indulged a little too much.

Look at that food belly.
And, all I want to do is:


I don't think I can run anymore.

I really am my mother's daughter.

October 10, 2014

Bruises or How I Workout Really Hard (Not)

Last night, after getting home, I changed into my red basketball shorts and noticed all these bruises on my legs.

Especially around my right knee.


My first thought was, "How did I get so many bruises without realizing it? Ohmygod, I'm dying. Am I dying? How did I not feel myself getting these bruises? Ohmygod, is it my nerves? Did I damage my nerves? I'm gonna die, aren't I?"

Then I realized I was being a hypochondriac and forced myself to calm down, and think rationally.

So my second thought was, "Wow, I must be working out really hard! Look at all this evidence. I'm such a rockstar."

Then I proceeded to press my bruises to see how much they hurt because I'm a masochist.

And, guess what? They didn't hurt. At all.

I thought it was some kind of super power or something and was feeling pretty proud.

Then I noticed that my fingers were blue too.

Strange.

And I pondered that puzzle for half a second.

Until I remembered something.


I was wearing my newish jeans yesterday.

So.

It's not that I worked out really hard, it's that I'm too cheap to buy jeans that are more than $20 and this cheapness dyed my legs blue.

I guess you really do get what you pay for.

My cheap jeans made me think I was dying.

Also, I accidentally gave myself silver hooves for feet.


Oops.

I think that pretty much sums up my life.

September 23, 2014

My Favorite 4-year-old

I got to hang out with my baby cousin a couple of weekends ago.

We were at a sushi restaurant with our family during the Mid-Autumn Festival and the little munchkin and I spent the dinner playing, drawing, and acting like 4-year-olds do.

At least I did, anyway.




Self-portrait by the 4-year-old

I may be biased but I think the munchkin has a career in the arts.

Isn't that self-portrait stunning?

I know you can't tell, but trust me when I say, it's a veritable likeness!

But wait, there's more.

Here's a still life masterpiece that she painstakingly drew in 2 minutes:


Is that not the best drawing of a banana you've ever seen?

Does it not invoke in you the passionate urge to experience a banana right now?

That, my friends, is art.

But wait, there's more.

If that still life didn't bestir your little heart, then perhaps abstract pieces are more your thing:


I believe the 4-year-old was going for a Jacksonian feel with the Pollockian finger drips.

Such a talent.

But wait, there's more.

Not only is she artistically-inclined, the 4-year-old is also full of comedic gold.

Some of the stuff that comes out of her mouth makes me howl with laughter.

I'm sure her father would rather I not encourage her with my vocal expressions of having been thunderously entertained, but I can't help it.

Can you?

Aunt Cyndi: Where are your manners?
4-year-old: At home.

I'm sure if I tried that one as a kid, I wouldn't've been able to sit down for a week.

4-year-old: Can you pick me up by my feet?
Me: Why?
4-year-old: I want to see how strong I am.

4-year-old logic is the best!

4-year-old: I win and you win, but I win more.

Everyone's a winner in her world, she's just a little bit more of a winner, that's all.

And that's fine by me.

I think she wins a little more with me than any other 4-year-old too.

She's my favorite.

And, I love her so much!

September 13, 2014

Quick and Easy Three-Ingredient Frozen Yogurt


I am in love.

Do you see this lusciousness?


I could eat it for days.

And I have.


It's so, SO delicious.

And, EASY.

Only 3 ingredients: frozen fruit, Greek yogurt, and honey.

The creaminess of the Greek yogurt adds a smoothness to the blended fruit; it tastes more decadent than it actually is. If you're looking for a lighter treat than ice cream, this is for you.

Throw your choice of frozen fruit into a food processor. Make sure it's straight from the freezer and not starting to melt.



Add 1 cup of Greek yogurt:



And 1 teaspoon of honey:



Then blend until smooth. Serve immediately.



Your tastebuds will rejoice.


I made this a few weekends ago for my mom. After smacking her lips, my mama said:

"Mmm. Good!"

Best endorsement ever.


Quick and Easy Three-Ingredient Frozen Yogurt
Makes 2 servings

Ingredients
  • 1 cup Greek yogurt, full fat
  • 1 package frozen fruit, about 10 ounces
  • 1 teaspoon honey, to taste
Directions
  1. Place frozen fruit, yogurt, and honey in a food processor and blend until smooth.
  2. Serve immediately.
Notes
  • I use plain Fage Total Classic Greek yogurt and raw honey.
  • This recipe works with a lot of different kinds of frozen fruit but I wasn't too keen on my experiment with wild blueberries because of the seeds. Strawberries, peaches, or mangoes work really well though.
  • This frozen yogurt is meant to be eaten immediately. I wouldn't recommend freezing it because lots of ice crystals will form making for a hard treat. However, if I had an ice cream maker, I would try it.

September 8, 2014

Happy 中秋節 Zhōngqiū Jié | Mid-Autumn Festival!

It's 中秋節 today and I am attempting to make mooncakes to celebrate.

Red bean paste: Done!
There are many many steps.

I hope I survive.

Have I mentioned I'm lazy?

Mooncake skin: Done! Thank goodness, now I can rest.

At least the recipe I'm using calls for lots of rest in between steps. Those directions might be invisible to you but I swear they're there!

I'm mostly making these mooncakes for my mom. She loves this pastry but I usually find them too sweet and dense for my liking. But, the other day, when I saw a mooncake recipe on Two Red Bowls, I wondered if I'd like them better if I made them myself and cut down on the sugar. The recipe looked easy enough to make so I thought I'd give it a try.

We shall see!

Happy 中秋節, everybody!