November 18, 2014

What I Do When I Do Nothing




DOING NOTHING . . .


. . . SO





This is what my day felt like today.

Although, I didn't really do nothing all day.

I applied to jobs.

It just felt like nothing because I am so SLOW.

November 12, 2014

How Lazy People Serve Brownies

This is my friend, Erin.


She likes to bake just as much as I do.

A couple of weeks ago, Erin made some brownies.

And left them on the counter to cool before cutting them.


Her husband wanders into the kitchen, spots the cooling pan, and asks:

"Why did you only make one brownie?"







November 4, 2014

Winter vs. Summer

Daylight Saving Time just ended this past weekend and it drove home to me the differences between summer and winter.

7:30pm during the summer:

"Where's the party at? Where are we going? 
What are we doing?"

As opposed to 7:30pm in winter:

"It's not bedtime yet? How??? Why?"

Does anyone else feel like this when the seasons change?

October 31, 2014

Halloween, My Mama, and a Pumpkin

The other day, I was in the kitchen, having a deep conversation with a Japanese kabocha pumpkin.



While wielding a butcher knife.



Thinking about how good the kabocha would taste roasted.



When all of a sudden.


My mama burst into the kitchen and said, "You scare me when you hold a knife. Let me do it."

And I was like, "Okay, if you want me to not do work, I'm okay with that."

"Also, why am I scary when I hold a knife?"

My mom didn't answer me.

But I have a sneaking suspicion it has to do with how big of a klutz I am.

Happy Halloween, everyone!

October 21, 2014

How I Exercise

Since I talked about working out really hard in my last post, I thought I'd write a little something about how I actually exercise. Anyone can do it! I promise.

Some days, I will feel the sudden, overwhelming urge to run and usually will oblige myself because it happens so very (very) rarely and I need to take advantage of the surprising need to be unlazy.

When one of those days happens, this is oftentimes, what goes down:

Stumble out of bed.



Feel full of energy.

Hatch a harebrained idea:


Head to the bathroom to wash up.

Look in the mirror.


Wonder how an extinct animal came to nest on my head.

Try to fix it.


It takes awhile. I need a haircut.

Wash up and change into sweats.

Eat breakfast.
Which goes like this:

1. Hmmm, what shall I have?
2. Bacon and eggs!
3. Ohh, I made cupcakes last night.
4. This leftover pizza will go bad if I don't eat it right now. Like, RIGHT NOW.


And before I know it, I've indulged a little too much.

Look at that food belly.
And, all I want to do is:


I don't think I can run anymore.

I really am my mother's daughter.